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ON A HAIR DRYER: Do not use while sleeping. ON A BAG OF FRITOS: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP: Directions: Use like regular soap. ON A FROZEN DINNER: Serving suggestion: Defrost. ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP: Fits one head. ON...

In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8x1 0 cell. At work you spend most of your time in a 6x8 cubicle. In prison you get 3 meals a day. At work you get a break for 1 meal and you have to pay for it. In prison you get time off for good behaviour. At work you get rewarded for...

Two nuns were in back of the convent smoking cigarettes, when one said, "It's bad enough that we have to sneak out here to smoke, but it really is a problem getting rid of the cigarette butts so that Mother Superior doesn't find them." The second nun said, "I've found a marvellous invention...

Rule # 1 Anything we said seven days ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after seven days. Rule # 2 If you don't want to dress like Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys. Rule # 3 If we say something that can be...

A woman went into a pet shop to buy her husband a pet. After looking around she realized that all the pets there were very expensive. She went to the counter and questioned the clerk. "I wanted to buy my husband a pet, but all of yours are so expensive," she said. "Well," said the clerk, "I...

A man comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells his wife, "Get me a beer before it starts!" The wife sighs and gets him a beer. Ten minutes later, he says, "Get me another beer before it starts!" She looks cross, but fetches...

When Bill Gates died, he went up to Heaven, where Saint Peter showed him to his house; a beautiful 20 room house, with grounds and a tennis court. Bill Gates was pleased, and spent many months enjoying the amenities of Heaven. One day, he was enjoying one of Heaven's many fine parks, when he...

•WinErr: 001 Windows loaded - System in danger •WinErr: 002 No Error - Yet •WinErr: 003 Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file •WinErr: 004 Erronious error - Nothing is wrong •WinErr: 005 Multitasking attempted - System confused •WinErr: 006 Malicious error - Desqview...

Q: Why dont blind people sky dive??? A: Cause it scares the shit out of the dog

dont bother downloading it, pic is better than the previous one but it has more sound faults and there are several graphics glitvches on disc 1, also its still a cam (someones head appears at one point) WAIT for a better one.

Treasure have finaly confirmed the release (in japan) of the final dreamcast title, luckily its a cracker :D IKARUGA for the Dremcast released on 5th, September 2002. In my opinion it is the best shooting game for the Dreamcast and it is a "MUST" game for all DC users. Oh and it looks...

ok, its not easy to fit, but it's the final completion of the neo series of chips (not from neo of course) it offers everything the messiah chip does BUT adds all the extra neo dvd functions with a reduced (for a neo chip) 22 wire install. htp://www.cyclonechip.com -Works On All Models & All...

i got this from a site ages ago (when AOL used to send out all those floppies before cd's became standard) 1. Mini cutting board (great for the office or the car, use metal door for knife). 2. Attach it to a ruler and presto! - you've got a fly swatter. 3. Construct a life size replica of...

*Coca-Cola was originally green. *Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury *It is possible to lead a cow upstairs but not downstairs. *Smartest dogs: 1) Scottish border collie; 2) Poodle; 3) Golden retriever. *Dumbest: Afghan hound. *Hawaiian alphabet has 12...

1- Dogs don't shop. 2- Dogs never expect gifts. 3- Dogs love it when your friends come over. 4- Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late. 5- The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you. 6- Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs. 7- Dogs don't notice if...

a little gif :D

A teacher asks her class to use the word 'contagious'. Roland the class swot, gets up and says, "Last year I got the measles and my Mum said it was contagious." "Well done, Roland" says the teacher. "Can anyone else try? "Katie, a sweet little girl with pigtails, says, "My grandma says...

"When I die, I want to die like my grandmother who died peacefully in her sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in her car." Author Unknown. "It's so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom." Joan Rivers. "If it wasn't for pick-pockets and frisking at airports I'd...

01. I can see your point, but you're still full of crap. 02. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronouce. 03. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. 04. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter. 05. Ahh...I see the screw-up...