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    A short love story

    I will seek and find you . . . I shall take you to bed and have my way with you . I will make you ache, shake & sweat until you moan & groan. I will make you beg for mercy, beg for me to stop. I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I'm finished with you. And, when I am...
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    Wal-Mart

    An elderly woman decided to prepare her will and told her preacher she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Wal-Mart. "Wal-Mart?" the preacher exclaimed. "Why Wal-Mart?" "Then I'll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week."
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    Children say the darnest things

    Should Children Witness Childbirth? Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to the call. The house was very, very dark, so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-year-old girl, to hold a flashlight high over her mommy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby. Very diligently...
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    Can you get married in heaven

    On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple is involved in a fatal car accident. The couple find themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While waiting, they begin to wonder: Could they possibly get married in Heaven? When St. Peter...
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    Gas prices

    Spending money is more fun than earnng it Http://home.planet.nl/~mnoorani/Gas_Prices.pps
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    When women forget their swimsuits

    I hope this is allowed here. Edited reason:- this link removed sorry streetwise this breeches this rule as laid out by woody > Please no nude pictures/links, or anything considered distasteful < it worked in opera .. >>>VIPER_1069 <<<< :) Some guys never grow up (I never did either)...
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    I think there's a moral to this story.

    The wife comes home early & finds her husband in their master bedroom making love to a beautiful, sexy young lady! "You unfaithful, disrespectful pig! What are you doing? How dare you do this to me the faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving this house, I want a divorce!" The...
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    XXL women

    Anybody interested? http://www.uploadtemple.com/view.php/1131532645.jpg http://www.uploadtemple.com/view.php/1131532816.jpg http://www.uploadtemple.com/view.php/1131532904.jpg http://www.uploadtemple.com/view.php/1131532969.jpg http://www.uploadtemple.com/view.php/1131533030.jpg...
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    The kilt question finally answered

    Those of you who were still wondering, here's the answer.
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    Jokes for women

    WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. And her husband is on the back of the milk carton. WOMEN'S REVENGE "Cash, check or...
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    Old but still good

    Your Daily Zen 1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me, either. Just leave me the hell alone. 2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire. 3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if...
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    Mad wife disease

    A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind him and whacked him on the head with a magazine. "What was that for?" he asked. "That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Laura Lou written on it," she replied. "Two weeks ago when I went to the...
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    Truth to be known

    They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense **************************************************************************** its difficult 2 understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as women..and then he turns them into Wives...
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    Dear husband/ Dear ex-wife

    Dear Husband: I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw...
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    Google fun

    Type "failure" in the Google search box and click "I'm feeling lucky".
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    Mirror mirror on the wall

    Once upon a time, Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb, and Quasimodo were all having a chat. Sleeping Beauty said, "I believe myself to be the most beautiful girl in the world." And Tom Thumb said, "I must be the smallest person in the world." And Quasimodo said, "I absolutely have to be the ugliest...
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    What is hentai

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    George Carlin's Views on Aging

    Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions. "How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half You're four and a half, going on...
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    How to stay young

    1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay " them " 2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. 3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain...
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    Things to know

    * Regular naps prevent old age... especially if you take them while driving. * Having one child makes you a parent; having two makes you a referee. * Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband! * They said we should all pay our tax with a...
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