This couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although
very much in love, couldn't wait to go into town, tease the barmaids and
party with his old buddies, so he says to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right
back..."
"Where are you going coochy cooh...?", asked the wife. "I'm going to the
bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife says to him, "You want a beer my love?" Then she opens the door
to the refrigerator and shows him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12
different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband doesn't know what to do, and the only thing that he can think of
saying is, "Yes, loolie loolie... but the bar.... you know... the frozen
glass...". He didn't get to finish the sentence, when the wife interrupts
him by saying, "You want a frozen glass puppy face"? She takes a huge beer
mug out of the freezer so frozen that she was getting chills holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, says, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar
they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...I won't be long.
I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres poochi pooh?" She opens the oven and takes out 15
dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in a blanket,
mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But sweet honey...at the bar...you know...the swearing, the dirty words and
all that..."
The wife looks at him and said:
"You want some dirty words cutie pie? SIT THE F#CK DOWN - DRINK YOUR F#CKIN'
BEER IN YOUR FROZEN F#CKIN' MUG - EAT YOUR F#CKIN' SNACKS -
YOU AREN'T GOING TO THE F#CKIN' BAR !!! GOT IT, ASSHOLE ?!?!"
very much in love, couldn't wait to go into town, tease the barmaids and
party with his old buddies, so he says to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right
back..."
"Where are you going coochy cooh...?", asked the wife. "I'm going to the
bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife says to him, "You want a beer my love?" Then she opens the door
to the refrigerator and shows him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12
different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband doesn't know what to do, and the only thing that he can think of
saying is, "Yes, loolie loolie... but the bar.... you know... the frozen
glass...". He didn't get to finish the sentence, when the wife interrupts
him by saying, "You want a frozen glass puppy face"? She takes a huge beer
mug out of the freezer so frozen that she was getting chills holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, says, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar
they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...I won't be long.
I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres poochi pooh?" She opens the oven and takes out 15
dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in a blanket,
mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But sweet honey...at the bar...you know...the swearing, the dirty words and
all that..."
The wife looks at him and said:
"You want some dirty words cutie pie? SIT THE F#CK DOWN - DRINK YOUR F#CKIN'
BEER IN YOUR FROZEN F#CKIN' MUG - EAT YOUR F#CKIN' SNACKS -
YOU AREN'T GOING TO THE F#CKIN' BAR !!! GOT IT, ASSHOLE ?!?!"